My Name Is Sarah

And I love babies.

That was my intro at a fireside for homeschoolers last night. 
Everyone was asked to say their name and something they like.  I agreed with those who said reading, singing, scripture study, and I'd probably add sewing and trees to my list.  But as I sat waiting for my turn, I couldn't think of anything I love and have loved my whole life as much as I love babies.

I was the girl at the ward parties and reunions hunting down anyone under 2 to hold or play with.

I remember when my cousin Eric was a baby I'd get up early every morning of Christmas Break and follow my aunt Maurine around until he woke up so I wouldn't miss the chance to dress him. 

I devoured the parenting magazines left on coffee tables at the homes where I babysat, and I loved to babysit. 

Most of the few fond memories I have of my early teen years were of sewing things for the new babies in our ward. 

My best friend in high school and I would make each other hope chest baby items for birthdays and holidays. 

And I remember the "kindred spirit" feeling I felt when a guy I knew in choir admitted that he loved browsing the baby sections of stores.

I played with my dolls until I started getting flack from my siblings, but even then I'd spend a Saturday here and there getting them all out and lovingly changing their outfits and giving them new hairstyles. 

I still love to browse the baby section, watch TV shows about labor and delivery, read birth stories online, make hair things and hats and binki clips and blankets and diapers and tiny little lovely things for tiny little lovely beings.

My friends' homebirths that I've been asked to attend were two of the most honored privileges of my life.

I like to see the latest baby inventions and try them out, even silly ones like baby leg warmers.  I still don't really get the point of these.  Why are they so much better than pants?  I don't know, but I keep putting them on him cause they're just so stinkin' cute!

I love to wash and smell and fold the little diapers and outfits and blankets. 

One of the hardest parts about having this new baby is that I can't just hold him and nurse him and fold his sweet laundry. 

I actually have quite a few other people to take care of, not to mention a rather large house and yard. 

I am slowly adding back in these other responsibilities, and thankfully I have a baby that complies.
He sleeps through the night and very rarely fusses.  He is perfectly happy to be down and playing when he is not nursing or sleepy. 
I am thankful for this.
It is a wonderful blessing.
But sometimes I feel guilty to pass by him kicking away in his bouncy seat and cooing while I go on to "get things done". 
Other times I long to sit and hold him sleeping on my chest or cuddle with him in bed, but my home and family cry out for attention.

I know there are lots of wonderful things to do and accomplish, so I already know the answer to the question that sometimes pops into my mind, "What will I do when I don't have a baby anymore?"

But I think it keeps popping up because my heart is bursting with joy at the fun I am having with my 7th baby.

And I know that when the time comes to live the answer to that question I will be moving on from the season of my life where I get to do my favorite thing.


...