Sometimes

Sometimes we do all of the things we've planned for a school day.

Sometimes my kitchen looks absolutely stunningly clean.

Sometimes our family has a really healthy diet.

Sometimes my kids look absolutely adorable, clean, cute hair, matching outfits, the whole works.

Sometimes the laundry is all clean, folded and put away before the next laundry day.

Sometimes I can open my home to friends on a regular basis.

Sometimes I get enough sleep.

Sometimes I take a shower...or fix my hair...or put on nice clothes.

Sometimes I go to the temple regularly.

Sometimes I can read to and snuggle my babies.

Sometimes I sing my kids to sleep.

Sometimes I make side dishes.

Sometimes I dust.

Sometimes I read something for my own self improvement.

Sometimes I read something just for fun.

Sometimes I read the Ensign cover to cover before the next issue comes.

Sometimes I pick and preserve bushels of fruit.

Sometimes I live within the budget.

Sometimes I do something special to show my husband how much I appreciate him.

Sometimes I keep in touch with old friends.

Sometimes I blog or scrapbook to preserve the wonderful little life I live.

Sometimes I write Thank You cards.

Sometimes I remember to take pictures and home videos.

Sometimes I do visiting teaching.

Sometimes I do something creative or crazy or fun on the spur of the moment.

Sometimes I shop around or use coupons to get a good deal.

Sometimes I exercise daily.

Sometimes I speak kindly and lovingly to my children and husband.

Sometimes our family scripture times and home evenings are truly inspirational.

Sometimes I rotate my kids' clothing right when the seasons change.

Sometimes I play with my children.

Sometimes I grow a beautiful garden.

Sometimes I get to watch my son's soccer games.

I think I should be doing all of these things regularly, if not every day or every time.
But I'm not.

I keep thinking if I study and plan and make charts enough, I will find the perfect schedule that makes just enough time to do each thing really well.

I don't think it is possible.  I don't think it will work. 

Even if it were possible, it would not have room for:
random acts of kindness,
wiping a nose dozens of times in a day,
cleaning up vomit or other nasty things,
staying up all night with a fussy baby,
an unexpected phone call from a friend,
scraped knees,
lost shoes,
yard sales,
clothes that don't fit,
changing nap schedules,
googling something- like the difference between a Linden and Catalpa tree,
finding a good deal on birthday and Christmas presents,
broken appliances,
headaches,
pets, (even goldfish)
helping a child through a tough day or experience,
misspelled words,
science experiments,
holidays,
and all of the other wonderful things that sometimes feel like they're getting in the way.

So why do I plan, if I know my plan is bound to fail?
We're supposed to have houses of order, right?
And we're supposed to slow down and simplify, right?
So how do I choose which things to do each day?
How do I accept that each day will look a little different from the one before and the one after?

I pray.
And pray.
And pray.

I still make a plan, just for guidance.

I try to listen.

I accept that a shower might be pointless since I will be instantly covered with baby's runny nose the minute I finish.  And then I'll sand the deck.
I accept that the kids don't need to look spotless and made up today if we're just going to be home.
I let the rest of my list go when I realize something spontaneous is happening that is much better than what I planned.
I move forward even though a rough night with a sick baby has once again foibled my plans to get a head start on the day. 
I bottle peaches and try not to wonder if I should be correcting a math lesson instead.
I cuddle and read to my toddler while the disaster in the kitchen waits.
I make arrangements regarding a used play kitchen I purchased online while my kids play hide and seek and devotional gets put off for another few minutes.

I am grateful for the Holy Ghost.

I find that every minute, I am forced to make a choice about how I spend my time.  It is not always a clear and logical choice, or even a matter of right and wrong.
It is often a matter of what is most important RIGHT NOW.

I have been experimenting with trying to live more by the Spirit for the last few days.
I have not "accomplished" the things I had hoped to do each day.
It has been interesting to let the days unfold this way, and it feels less frantic.
More peaceful.
More loving.

I think it is okay.

If I live by the Spirit always, it will be okay to keep doing all of those good things sometimes.

....